Best Jokes From The Justin Bieber Roast
Oh, how the insults flew!
Major celebrities lined up to roast Justin Bieber who made quite an entrance in angel wings before he came crashing to the stage.
Kevin Hart joked, "I'm asking you to believe in a man with the voice of Stevie Wonder and the driving skills of Stevie Wonder."
Martha Stewart, Shaquille O'Neal, and Anchorman Ron Burgundy, aka Will Ferrell, all took shots at Bieber for his wild and erratic behavior.
Martha Stewart said, "Let's get to the reason I'm here tonight which is to give Justin Bieber some tips to use when he inevitably ends up in prison. I've been in lock up and you wouldn't last a week, so, pay attention. The first thing you'll need is a shank."
Who knew the domestic diva could get so raunchy!
She added, "Here's my final piece of advice. You need to settle down - bring some balance into your life. Find yourself the right gal, but she'll have to be someone on your level. Someone powerful and famous and rich. Someone you can smoke a joint with, and indulge in the ocassional three-way."
Will Ferrell, in his Ron Burgundy character said, "As far as I'm concerned, this guy is doing it right. This kid has spunk, moxie, and probably a few other STDs."
He was even called out for that infamous moment when he egged his neighbor's house. Shaquille O'Neal said, "You cost $20,000 in damages. Imagine the damage you would have caused if you threw like a boy."
Bieber took it all in stride and lobbed a few jabs of his own.
"Kevin loves to see himself on the big screen. For him that's an iPad mini," joked Bieber.
He also apologized for his antics that have gotten him into so much trouble and made a promise to change.
"The things that I have done don't define who I am. I am a kind-hearted person who loves people and through it all I lost some of my best qualities. For that, I'm sorry," said Bieber.