By the time Big Sean's 31st birthday rolled around on Monday, he'd deleted every single post from his Instagram account, except for three videos.
In them, the rapper shares his recent struggles with depression and anxiety, and how therapy helped him.
"I just felt lost. You know what I'm saying? I didn't know how I got there. I've been meditating since I was 17 years old,” he began. You know, that helps with anxiety, depression all those things. All those things that I felt. But it wasn't doing it all the way for this, so I knew that this required some special attention.
"So what I did was, I started therapy," he continued. "I got a good therapist. You know what I'm saying? I was blessed enough to talk to some super spiritual people. And they made me realize one thing that I was missing in my life, and that was clarity.”
Although Big Sean, whose real name is Sean Michael Leonard Anderson, never reveals exactly what triggered him, the Detroit native said it all began around this time last year— even alluding to it during an event celebrating the launch of his Puma collection last March.
"I'm working on my mental health. I've been working on trying to make sure I'm a better person," he said in the clip.
Big Sean’s plate looked quite full last year. In addition to the launch, he bought a new house, was featured on several different records and became an executive producer of the History Channel documentary “Detroit: Comeback City.”
In the midst of it all, Sean said music began to feel like a burden and toxic relationships started to take their toll.
"I realized it all started with me. I had to analyze myself I couldn't point the finger at anybody else I had to point it at myself."
While being introspective, Sean said he started to do activities he considered fun, like skydiving, and they led him to rediscover the joy within himself.
"You can't give or depend on somebody for love and a good time if you can't give it to yourself," he said.
Big Sean dropped his last studio album in 2017. Now, after practicing self-care, he is not only enjoying being in the studio again, he said he's making the best music of his life, sharing some of it on social media Monday night.
"Be clear about what you wanna do and who you wanna do it with just know that it all translates to happiness and it feels good to be back at a higher level."