Turns out, the royal couple of YouTube aren’t quite as happy as they appear.
Vlogger Tana Mongeau, 21, released a new video Sunday detailing how difficult the last year has been for her – particularly when it came to her marriage to 22-year-old fellow YouTuber Jake Paul.
The pair were wed in a symbolic, but not legally binding, ceremony just four months ago.
“I loved who I was when I was with him so much I kind of put on rose-colored glasses and I realized, I would do anything to feel this feeling forever,” Mongeau said in the vlog titled “the truth about everything (the wedding, Jake, Alissa, Erika, MTV, mental health, drugs, etc.)”
She spoke about the problems she said her family experienced as she grew up, her failed 2018 event, Tanacon, and how her relationship and August wedding to Jake Paul seemed like the silver lining.
“The wedding night was just hell for me,” she said. “The second Jake and I got married, everything changed. The second he said, ‘I do,’ to me, he was just kind of like, ‘Now what?’”
Though she and Paul clarified shortly after they were married that the Las Vegas wedding was not legally binding, Mongeau emphasized their relationship was in no way fake. “Everyone thought it was for clout or fame and I think that made it so much worse for me, mentally,” she said, but noting the partnership did help her "reach so many dreams."
Mongeau also spoke about the open nature of their relationship, and said that has taken a toll on her mental health. “I am not blaming him,” she explained. “I was the one green-lighting everything because I just wanted to make him happy.”
The YouTube couple, who have a combined 25 million subscribers, are still together despite it all, Mongeau said. But, she said, they are taking it “day by day.”
“I will always have a bond with him that I don’t ever see myself having with anyone else,” Mongeau said.